twinArmageddons ♊ Sollux Captor (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
viiru2alert) wrote2013-01-12 04:17 pm
viiru2alert) wrote2013-01-12 04:17 pm
Entry tags:
seven (text) ♊ if you're strong, you'll survive, and you'll keep your dream alive
Hello PokéGear network, this is your captain speaking.
At least I might as well be. This is Sollux Captor, aka the guy who may as well have repaired every single damn Gear in the Johto-Kanto area, and I'm not here to talk about my shitty job. I'm here to talk about why I'm not using hideous mustard-yellow text: it's because i'm about to spill a textdump and, for the first time in my life, mind, I'm using the normal font for your convenience.
It's recently come to my attention that all of you suck, suck, suck at battling.
Not at the technique or the power, no. I'm sure there are plenty of people who are great at that. But for every Trainer who isn't aiming to be the top of the Pokémon League, and are just doing this for whatever reason, let me ask you something: the only Pokémon you've fought with in the past month have been wild ones, right? To train your Pokémon? If you're like most people, I'm right. We have here a world inhabited by creatures of immense magical and physical power, and we're not even using any of them... even though we make them fight the local wildlife critters as though we are. Doesn't that strike you as a little bit retarded?
So for this reason, I've had some nice chats with some friends of mine for this idea I got the other day.
It's called the Pokémon Fight Club. That is exactly what it is.
It's basically a little... battle meeting, I guess you would call it, that doesn't depend on meeting in a certain location. Think of it like a game, a video game if you're familiar with that kind of stuff, where you can go out into the world and play this game with anyone you happen to meet on whatever Route you're on. It's like that. But with Pokémon battles. The whole point of this is to fight way more interesting and challenging opponents than the uneducated heathens in the tall grass, and I guess you can meet people and make friends too, if you're into that kind of stuff. And, of course, promote a healthy and friendly battling culture in the middle of all these goddamn Breeders.
Everyone in the PFC doesn't have to attend meetings or whatever to be a member, because that's just impractical. We're all traveling Trainers, for fuck's sake. What you do need to do is keep a binder or a notebook or a PokéGear document for the sole purpose of keeping track of your PFC battles. If you want, we can even have a contest or something at the end of the year for people who did a shitton of battling, and whoever won the most legitimate battles wins. It would really help if you had video documentation of these battles, too; take them with your PokéGear and save them onto your accounts in the PC. That makes it a lot easier for everyone, seriously.
The way this works is with an armband. Just any old armband will do, we won't make you spend 2000 Poké on a special one. You're walking along the Route and gee whiz, that person walking on the opposite side of the road is wearing an armband! Now what the fuck does that mean? It means they're part of the PFC, that's what it means. Every Trainer in the PFC needs to show everyone else that they're part of the PFC and are therefore open to battling anytime, anywhere. If you're wearing an armband it means you have to accept every single battle offer you get from some other person wearing an armband, and it also means you should be on the lookout for other people also wearing armbands so you can challenge them, too. And if you're worried about your poor little babies being forced into a fight when they're too weak to hold their ground, here's an idea: take off the armband.
I love bolding things. Christ.
Anyway, these armbands serve another purpose. You may be worried about walking up to a Trainer, asking them for a battle, and not knowing that they secretly have a team of obscenely powerful Dragon-types that they're pitting against your level five Igglybuff. We have a fix for this. They're the armbands. We have certain "color tiers" of armband, and each tier stands for a different level. That way, if you challenge a team of obscenely powerful Dragon-types with your level five Igglybuff, you were completely informed beforehand and it is literally completely your fault. (By the way, this is the exception to the "every battle rule": if the other guy has a band at least two tiers higher than yours, then you can turn him down. You can also sleep nicely with the knowledge that he is a giant flaming asshole and will probably be struck by divine lightning at some point in the future.)
I'm sure there are a bunch of people who are great with sewing and all that shit, and they can make you custom armbands with little designs on them. That's totally okay. Just as long as the dominant color is still your color tier. You know what happens when it's not? Dragon-type guy comes back and he thinks you're in his tier, but you still have your level five Igglybuff. It is still completely your fault.
Here's the color tiers.
1-10: Red
11-20: Brown
21-30: Orange
31-40: Yellow
41-50: Green
51-60: Teal
61-70: Blue
71-80: Purple
81-90: Pink
91-100: Black
100: White
Oh, also. Say you want to train a bunch of people on your main team, but some of them felt like super overachievers the other day and are now in a different tier than your other ones. Or they're in a lower tier because they're lazy or you just caught them or something. Please, for the love of god, don't wear six armbands, you look stupid. Instead, go find some small badges (not Badges, mind, you're just asking to be robbed if you do that) of different colors. Pick the tier that most of your team is on. Then pin on a badge for every Pokémon that's not in the tier encompassed by your armband. So if you have six Pokémon and four of them are green, but one of them is yellow and one of them is teal, then pin a yellow badge and a teal badge on your green band. Simple.
If enough people look like they might actually care about this, then I'll flesh it out more, even write up a more detailed rules page. But for now, if you've got any response to this idea (even if it's just a stupid looking GIF), then by all means, post that shit.
Yours insincerely,
2ollux captor.
At least I might as well be. This is Sollux Captor, aka the guy who may as well have repaired every single damn Gear in the Johto-Kanto area, and I'm not here to talk about my shitty job. I'm here to talk about why I'm not using hideous mustard-yellow text: it's because i'm about to spill a textdump and, for the first time in my life, mind, I'm using the normal font for your convenience.
It's recently come to my attention that all of you suck, suck, suck at battling.
Not at the technique or the power, no. I'm sure there are plenty of people who are great at that. But for every Trainer who isn't aiming to be the top of the Pokémon League, and are just doing this for whatever reason, let me ask you something: the only Pokémon you've fought with in the past month have been wild ones, right? To train your Pokémon? If you're like most people, I'm right. We have here a world inhabited by creatures of immense magical and physical power, and we're not even using any of them... even though we make them fight the local wildlife critters as though we are. Doesn't that strike you as a little bit retarded?
So for this reason, I've had some nice chats with some friends of mine for this idea I got the other day.
It's called the Pokémon Fight Club. That is exactly what it is.
It's basically a little... battle meeting, I guess you would call it, that doesn't depend on meeting in a certain location. Think of it like a game, a video game if you're familiar with that kind of stuff, where you can go out into the world and play this game with anyone you happen to meet on whatever Route you're on. It's like that. But with Pokémon battles. The whole point of this is to fight way more interesting and challenging opponents than the uneducated heathens in the tall grass, and I guess you can meet people and make friends too, if you're into that kind of stuff. And, of course, promote a healthy and friendly battling culture in the middle of all these goddamn Breeders.
Everyone in the PFC doesn't have to attend meetings or whatever to be a member, because that's just impractical. We're all traveling Trainers, for fuck's sake. What you do need to do is keep a binder or a notebook or a PokéGear document for the sole purpose of keeping track of your PFC battles. If you want, we can even have a contest or something at the end of the year for people who did a shitton of battling, and whoever won the most legitimate battles wins. It would really help if you had video documentation of these battles, too; take them with your PokéGear and save them onto your accounts in the PC. That makes it a lot easier for everyone, seriously.
The way this works is with an armband. Just any old armband will do, we won't make you spend 2000 Poké on a special one. You're walking along the Route and gee whiz, that person walking on the opposite side of the road is wearing an armband! Now what the fuck does that mean? It means they're part of the PFC, that's what it means. Every Trainer in the PFC needs to show everyone else that they're part of the PFC and are therefore open to battling anytime, anywhere. If you're wearing an armband it means you have to accept every single battle offer you get from some other person wearing an armband, and it also means you should be on the lookout for other people also wearing armbands so you can challenge them, too. And if you're worried about your poor little babies being forced into a fight when they're too weak to hold their ground, here's an idea: take off the armband.
I love bolding things. Christ.
Anyway, these armbands serve another purpose. You may be worried about walking up to a Trainer, asking them for a battle, and not knowing that they secretly have a team of obscenely powerful Dragon-types that they're pitting against your level five Igglybuff. We have a fix for this. They're the armbands. We have certain "color tiers" of armband, and each tier stands for a different level. That way, if you challenge a team of obscenely powerful Dragon-types with your level five Igglybuff, you were completely informed beforehand and it is literally completely your fault. (By the way, this is the exception to the "every battle rule": if the other guy has a band at least two tiers higher than yours, then you can turn him down. You can also sleep nicely with the knowledge that he is a giant flaming asshole and will probably be struck by divine lightning at some point in the future.)
I'm sure there are a bunch of people who are great with sewing and all that shit, and they can make you custom armbands with little designs on them. That's totally okay. Just as long as the dominant color is still your color tier. You know what happens when it's not? Dragon-type guy comes back and he thinks you're in his tier, but you still have your level five Igglybuff. It is still completely your fault.
Here's the color tiers.
1-10: Red
11-20: Brown
21-30: Orange
31-40: Yellow
41-50: Green
51-60: Teal
61-70: Blue
71-80: Purple
81-90: Pink
91-100: Black
100: White
Oh, also. Say you want to train a bunch of people on your main team, but some of them felt like super overachievers the other day and are now in a different tier than your other ones. Or they're in a lower tier because they're lazy or you just caught them or something. Please, for the love of god, don't wear six armbands, you look stupid. Instead, go find some small badges (not Badges, mind, you're just asking to be robbed if you do that) of different colors. Pick the tier that most of your team is on. Then pin on a badge for every Pokémon that's not in the tier encompassed by your armband. So if you have six Pokémon and four of them are green, but one of them is yellow and one of them is teal, then pin a yellow badge and a teal badge on your green band. Simple.
If enough people look like they might actually care about this, then I'll flesh it out more, even write up a more detailed rules page. But for now, if you've got any response to this idea (even if it's just a stupid looking GIF), then by all means, post that shit.
Yours insincerely,
2ollux captor.
[textJACK]
but i think the problem is you cant write!
because it says DORK
capslock and all i can do that thanks
[textJACK]
ii am lookiing iin the miirror riight now and iit 2ay2 MATURE ADULT.
not even iin red 2harpiie, eiither. thii2 ii2 blue.
ii thiink you need two look iintwo correctiive len2e2, aa.
[textJACK]
swap your glasses to see DORK in red
[textJACK]
JEEZ.
[textJACK]
[textJACK]
theyre not grafted two my forehead, je2u2 chrii2t.
[textJACK]
i meant that obviously the writing is on your forehead
therefore glasses wouldnt interfere!
[textJACK]
diid you con2iider that?
II DIIDNT THIINK 2O.
[textJACK]
thats you right now
thats right ive learned stuff from the people here what now
[textJACK]
2orry.
outcla22ed.
[textJACK]
not actually sure whats happening there
are you throwing my little person
is that what your little person is doing?
rude
[textJACK]
the liittle per2on ii2 clearly beiing thrown by the table.
(the liittle per2on ii2 you, btw.)
[textJACK]
invalidated by the laws of physics and life so ha!!!
(/¯◡ ‿ ◡)/¯ ~ ┻━┻
thats us before
[textJACK]
your phy2iic2 ii2 iinvaliid.
[textJACK]
:p
werent we talking about something else
[textJACK]
[textJACK]
[textJACK]
no iidea what youre on about, but ok.
[textJACK]
i blame you though
[textJACK]
[textJACK]