thirteen (text) ♊ i won't release tomorrow. i won't entomb yesterday.

[viiru2alert]

[On the 25th, a video pops up on the PokéGear. If the thread hasn't gotten to that point yet, there will be a big, embarrassing temper tantrum involved on Sollux's part, over his inability to CATCH A FUCKING FOSSIL FISH while it's swarming. If anyone responds, he doesn't see it.]

[And then, several days later...]

hey guy2.
2o ii gue22 2ome of you mu2t have 2aw that viideo earliier, huh?
iif you diidnt, dont worry about iit, iiit2 not iimportant.
iin fact iit i2nt even real.
fuckiin fake.
kk and ii (kk being the shorter one) were just kiind of fuckiing aroudn on the pokégear and we got iin an argument for old tiimes 2ake. we do that all the tiime, it's ok, nothiing came of iit.
ii mean the argument wa2nt even real anyway.
fuckin fakey fake viideo.
2o dont come two me all WOW SOLLYX YOU ARE A FUCKING WIIMP WHYD YOU FLIIP OUT LIIKE THAAT.
becau2e ii diidnt.d efiiniitely not.
i don't even know why kk po2ted iit to be hone2t.

yeeah thats iit, captwor out


[Obviously, he's lying through his mutant oversized teeth. Feel free to mock him relentlessly; you'll probably get a nuclear breakdown on his point, but hey, at least it'll be funny.]

Comments

[Video]

[itsjustdust]

[All the tact coming at you.]

So... DID you catch one?

[text]

[viiru2alert]

no comment

[Spoilers: he hasn't. And he won't until the last day of the event.]

[text]

[itsjustdust]

[Fine then. Text it is.]

What kind of answer is that? That's totally a no.

[text] 1/2

[viiru2alert]

JSSESUS FUCK THEYRES SPARKLES
FUCK ME
FUCK YOU
FUCK THIS

[text] 2/2

[viiru2alert]

[And several minutes later:]

al2o, iit2 an iim workiign on it.
becau2e ii am.

[usedshooshpap]

DON'T YOU GO BLAMING ME FOR YOUR INEPTITUDE.
I AM A HELPLESS VICTIM IN ALL OF THIS.

[text]

[itsjustdust]

[Serves you right.]

Ahhh, are you in the right place and everything?

Why that thing anyway?

[text]

[viiru2alert]

nah, iive gota pokémon wiith diive so iim good to go.

[viiru2alert]

look at hiim, ladiie2 and gemtlemen!
karkat vanta2 tryiing once agaiin two create u2ele22 2triife iin the world!
2HAME ON HIIM.

[text]

[itsjustdust]

Maybe he's thwarting you on purpose?

[text]

[viiru2alert]

the entiire world ii2 thwartiing me on purpo2e, oo.
alway2.
every 2iingle day.

[text]

[thevveribest]

the only thing that smells wworse than your putrid fuckin mustard blood is the absolute BULLSHIT your colorin it wwith
nice try sol but EVVERYONE knowws youre full a absolute shit

[text]

[viiru2alert]

ha. ha ha. ha ha ha ha ha ha.
and yet youre the one who2 talkiing.
2orry, but no.

[text]

[thevveribest]

i may be talkin but i aint spewwin total rubbish like some scumsucker wwho types in a digestivvesack wwrenchin yelloww
fuckin peasant
nice freak out by the by real fuckin classy

[text]

[viiru2alert]

you 2eriiou2ly need two stahp gettiing all bent out of 2hape about the fuckinig hhemospectrum.

[text]

[thevveribest]

howw about no
just because im the only one wwith the proper facilities to recognize its UTMOST importance doesnt mean im gettin bent outta shape
perhaps you should wwork on learnin howw to spell hemospectrum before wwhinin about it

[text]

[viiru2alert]

perhap2 you should learn how to 2pell "how".

[text]

[thevveribest]

attackin my quirk huh
wwoww sol youre gettin rather desperate for some material
but its alright i dont expect those wwith filthy blood pollutin their sponges to be able to keep up wwith the royal castes in this sort of repertoire

[text]

[viiru2alert]

dont flatter your2elf.
ii ju2t dont want two fuckiing bother wa2tiing any more braiinpower on your 2piinele22 glubbing.

[text]

[thevveribest]

pfft spineless
i aint the one wwithout the spinal column here sol
if anyone is its you by the looks a this exchange
but i dont blame you takin the cowwards route you aint got nothin i cant beat into its proper place after all

[text]

[viiru2alert]

yeah ok.
iit2 not liike youve ever done anythiing liike thii2 your2elf, after all.
eriidan ampora? whiiny and up2et?
NOOOOOO.
anyway. iif you dont 2ay 2omethiing damn compelliing riight now, then iim ju2t goiing two 2top talkiing becau2e thii2 ii2 2hiit and you are al2o 2hiit.

[He's not going to stop either way, obviously.]

[text]

[thevveribest]

oh yes because a troll cant be upset for LEGITIMATE reasons i clearly forgot
wwhere as here youre bein nothin but a grub wwho shit its diaperstub and has chosen to wwhine an cry and roll around in its owwn excrement and then attempt to deny it because youre as spongeless as you are fuckin pathetic
but fine by me if you stop talkin aint like im gonna be missin your ugly little wwords none

text

[wontturntostone]

You Cannot Honestly Expect This To Work Sollux
You Would Have Been Better Off Saying Nothing About That Entire Unfortunate Scene

text

[usedshooshpap]

THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING.

[text]

[usedshooshpap]

IT'S PURELY OUT OF SPITE.