thirteen (text) ♊ i won't release tomorrow. i won't entomb yesterday.

[viiru2alert]

[On the 25th, a video pops up on the PokéGear. If the thread hasn't gotten to that point yet, there will be a big, embarrassing temper tantrum involved on Sollux's part, over his inability to CATCH A FUCKING FOSSIL FISH while it's swarming. If anyone responds, he doesn't see it.]

[And then, several days later...]

hey guy2.
2o ii gue22 2ome of you mu2t have 2aw that viideo earliier, huh?
iif you diidnt, dont worry about iit, iiit2 not iimportant.
iin fact iit i2nt even real.
fuckiin fake.
kk and ii (kk being the shorter one) were just kiind of fuckiing aroudn on the pokégear and we got iin an argument for old tiimes 2ake. we do that all the tiime, it's ok, nothiing came of iit.
ii mean the argument wa2nt even real anyway.
fuckin fakey fake viideo.
2o dont come two me all WOW SOLLYX YOU ARE A FUCKING WIIMP WHYD YOU FLIIP OUT LIIKE THAAT.
becau2e ii diidnt.d efiiniitely not.
i don't even know why kk po2ted iit to be hone2t.

yeeah thats iit, captwor out


[Obviously, he's lying through his mutant oversized teeth. Feel free to mock him relentlessly; you'll probably get a nuclear breakdown on his point, but hey, at least it'll be funny.]

Comments

[text]

[itsjustdust]

Eh? It's not a hate date! It's just two friends meeting up to prove who is superior because we can't see eye to eye on who it is. That's all!

Oh, and we were thinking maybe bets could happen with this too, but we'd have to plan it better for that and that'd probably have to be another time.

[text]

[papshooshing]

I TOLD YOU, DIDN'T I?
SUCH THINGS MEAN SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT TO A TROLL THAN IT DOES A HUMAN.
OR ARE YOU PLAYING MY BEST FRIEND?

[text]

[itsjustdust]

[He frowned at the gear critically.]

Well, I'm not gonna be a jerk and cancel, first, we've had this planned for MONTHS. Second, just what all is the follow up I should be expecting here because I'm clearly unprepared.

[text]

[papshooshing]

SLOPPY MAKE OUTS ARE USUALLY PAR THE COURSE.
CAREFUL, THOUGH
CAPTOR IS A BITER.

[text]

[itsjustdust]

[Doing that long pause thing again because now he's going to figure out how to let down Sollux about a lack of make outs. Damn it.]

A biter. Well, that's a bonus I guess.

[text]

[papshooshing]

JUST BE GLAD THAT HE DOESN'T HAVE HIS USUAL FUCKED UP TEETH.
IT WOULD BE LIKE KISSING A JAGGED CHAINSAW.

[text]

[itsjustdust]

Hey, it's not like there aren't people back home with super pointy teeth alright? Just never had any urge to kiss any of them. Opposite side of the battle field and whatnot.

[text]

[papshooshing]

HAHAHA.
DUDE, NO. YOU CANNOT COMPREHEND THE LEVEL OF "POINTY TEETH" THAT HE HAS.
THEY DON'T EVEN FIT IN HIS MOUTH CORRECTLY.
HE EVEN THOUGHT I WAS DOING HIM A FAVOR WHEN I KNOCKED THEM OUT OF HIS MOUTH.
YOU'RE NOT *WORRIED* ARE YOU?

[text]

[itsjustdust]

Hey, I like to have all the information when I make choices okay? Having only part of the information tends to reaaaaally screw me up.

[text]

[papshooshing]

KIND OF SCREWED THE POOCH ON THAT ALREADY, HAVEN'T YOU.

[text]

[itsjustdust]

HAVE NOT! No, I'm good. This is still a workable situation, I just have to figure out how to... tackle it. That's all.

[text]

[papshooshing]

HE'D PROBABLY LIKE IT IF YOU DID TACKLE IT.
LITERALLY.

Re: [text]

[itsjustdust]

YEAH WELL, AT LEAST SOME THINGS ARE UNIVERSAL! But I didn't mean it like that okay? Okay.

[text]

[papshooshing]

DENIAL.

[text]

[itsjustdust]

Hey, I'm not promising hot makeouts, alright? Sorry. Besies, you make it sound like you were hoping to watch or something. You weren't were you?

[text]

[papshooshing]

THAT'S MORE EQUIUS' THING THAN MINE.
DON'T GET ME WRONG, I LOVE A WELL CONSTRUCTED FERRY DOWN THE TUNNEL OF LOVE, BUT ONLY IN THE PURELY FICTIONAL SENSE.

[text]

[itsjustdust]

Okay then. So however it works out isn't going to be something that really really is your thing.

[text] THREADJACKING 8D;;;

[ghostpepper]

Obito you never told me you were in love with someone who you wanted to fight? Why not? And what did you do to your text stuff? Whatever just beat the crap out of him and then go for it!

[text]

[itsjustdust]

WAIT! WAIT JUST A SECOND!

First, I'm in love with Rin, I TOLD you that. Second, I do want to beat up Sollux but that's not love related, and I'm totally going to prove that Shinobi are a million times more awesome. I mean, he's awesome and all but he didn't tell me he'd take this as makeout times okay?

Also.

WHAT AM I GOING FOR HERE KUSHINA-NEE? I THINK YOU'RE CONFUSED.

[text]

[ghostpepper]

[OH HEY there's the capslock button... on accident 8D]

But YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT DATES. ARE YOU SURE YOU'RE NOT IN LOVE WITH TWO PEOPLE OR SOMETHING? ALSO KICK HIS ASS A SECOND TIME FOR ME IF HE'S SAYING SHINOBI ARE ANYTHING BUT THE BEST OKAY?

[text]

[itsjustdust]

[He'll not so accidentally do it back.]

NOT THAT KIND OF DATE!!! LIKE, A PLAN DATE, NOT A MAKING GOO GOO EYES DATE OKAY?!

Besides the only person I've been on a date with is Shino, okay, and that totally didn't involve me beating him up.

OH, RIGHT, YES, THAT THING. SOLLUX KEEPS SAYING TROLLS, HE'S ONE, ARE BETTER.

[text]

[ghostpepper]

YOU WENT ON A DATE WITH SHINO? YOU NEVER TOLD ME THAT EITHER. HOW DO I TURN THIS OFf? Oh that button.

[THERE IT IS...]

[text]

[itsjustdust]

If we're being fair I'm not sure Shino realizes that moonlit walks to go stare at a waterfall at a party with a lot of people counts as a date so, uh. Yeah.

[text]

[ghostpepper]

That sounds so romantic. Where is this waterfall? [She's getting ideas for her and Minato..........]

Are you sure you're still in love with Rin?

[text]

[itsjustdust]

OF COURSE I DO KUSHINA-NEE!!!!!!!!!!!

What kind of question was that even? I'll love Rin my whole life and death and life again no matter what happens. Doesn't mean I can't care about other people too, that's all. Besides, it's not like I even thought about looking at other girls. Nope nope nope.

[If you wanted that question answered you shouldn't have asked the other one Kushina.]